The T20 Drinking Game

Feeling bored? Hate Mohammad Sami? Need a drink? Fear not, for we’ve decided to come up with a drinking game for when the Pakistani cricket team is playing in the T20.

P.S: Thank you Nadir Hassan and Imran Yusuf  for the bulk of the suggestions.

1. Every time Shoaib Akhtar says “hittain” on Geo Super tear out a page of the Oxford English Dictionary and roll a fat joint in it.

2. Every time Rameez Raja talks about the Caribbean drums, have a shot of Tequila.

3. Every time Moin Khan says “body image is important” do a body shot off the cleavage of a big-breasted girl. Or go throw up.

4. Every time Shahid Afridi hits the ball straight up in the air, take a swig of Skyy vodka.

5. Every time Mohammed Amir’s luscious hair flops around, get high by sniffing hair spray.

6. Every time Shoaib Akhtar wears a T-shirt so tight his bulging beer belly shows, down a can of Murree’s finest.

7. Every time Rameez Raja mispronounces a player’s name, dunk your head in a vat of absinthe.

8. Every time a Pakistani player drops a catch or has a brain fart while fielding, spit out whatever you’re drinking.

9. Every time Mohammad Sami starts bowling just drink anything.

10. Every time Shahif Afridi gives an encouraging slap on the bum to one of his underperforming bowlers drink a Sex on the Beach.

11. Every time someone you’re watching it with makes fun of Fawad’s monobrow (let’s get over it already) slip the other person some desi vodka. It’ll shut em up.

12. Every time Mr. Jeem starts dancing on your screen, drink Scotch. Lots of it.

Please submit additions to the list in the comments section.

10 comments
  1. Tazeen said:

    Brilliant.

    PS: Shoaib Akhtar also spews jems like ballain, Feildain and swingain.

    • Tazeen said:

      oops, my bad. I too was affected and wrote jems instead of gems.

      • I still can’t believe he’s gotten a gig as an expert on TV.

  2. Mr. Tambourine Man said:

    Oi don’t be hating on ‘hittain’. Its an integral part of street/village cricketer lexicon.

  3. aneela said:

    every time someone falls for “Woh Dekho Shoaib Sania are here” make your doodh patti irish.

  4. When Shoaib Malik starts bowling and his face reminds you of Sania and Ayesha, drink Bagpiper.. Khoob jamegi jab mil baithenge teen yaar :p

  5. Like me, Fawad Alam needs to cut his unibrow or get it threaded. This is getting too much.

  6. zhs said:

    bibi, you don’t know shit about cricket. drink away.

  7. n said:

    funny!
    just out of curiosity, what’s desi vodka..?

  8. Imran said:

    true facts but drink away!!!

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